


(this time) i'm ready to run.

by lesbianjeongyeon



Series: feelings. [1]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: College AU, F/F, its exaggerated, not really - Freeform, slight alcoholism implication but uh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-22
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2019-01-21 14:53:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12460083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lesbianjeongyeon/pseuds/lesbianjeongyeon
Summary: there's a lightning in your eyes i can't denythen there's me inside a sinking boat, running out of timewithout you i'll never make it out alive----the universe pushing two people together sounds unrealistic in your book, but when you look back on how many times you’ve seen her in the past few days you all but wonder, maybe it’s not so unrealistic after all. maybe fate can be on your side, at least once, since it wasn’t ever before.or; a college au no one asked for.





	(this time) i'm ready to run.

**Author's Note:**

> i'm not sure how long i want this to be yet, and honestly it depends on how much people are into it, i can either do this a real slowburn type of way or i can do this the way i think i might go and make it a 3 chapter au. either way i hope you enjoy it. it me up @tahani-eleanor on tumblr if you want!
> 
> as usual, i spent more time on choosing the right one direction song to use than editting so, shrug.

You meet her when you’re in your last year of college.

(You only just transferred there, she’s an apparently well-known junior on campus, and you’re just trying to finish your degree so you can get to the academy that much faster.)

Though you suppose meet isn’t really the word you’re looking for. In fact, it’s probably the last word you’re looking for. You didn’t meet her, you stared across the overcrowded bar full of drunk and definitely underaged college students as she downed two shots before leading a guy out to the dance floor.

You didn’t meet her because all you did was catch her eye, and watch her smirk, and you realize if you had met her, she wouldn’t remember you the next day because she’s so intoxicated.

(You think that might be the end of it but it’s not.)

You see her so many times after that.

You see her in the hallways stumbling with one coffee in her hand and the bag of her back sporting two energy drinks, that you’re convinced might not even be from this country, in each side pocket.

You see her slipping out of a boys dorm early the morning while you’re on your morning jog. Trying to fix her hair while carrying her shoes in her hands, still sporting somewhat sloppily the outfit she clearly wore out to party that night.

But you don’t find out her name, you really don’t even know her past your own deductive skills, until the next party you attend.

You didn’t party hard in high school because you wanted to get out of the small town you were stuck in, and you didn’t party in your first years of college because you had extra classes you were taking, a scholarship to maintain. But it’s your senior year of college, and near the end of the first semester and you have a break in your work, nothing does or so important that it needed to be studied, and so you want to party.

You definitely don’t spend an extra ten minutes finding the hottest outfit you could put on to impress a probably straight, mysterious girl, who you don’t even know the name of. Because that would be entirely out of line and a little bit ridiculous.

(But you did exactly that.)

And if you were admitting that you had done that, you would admit a small glimmer of hope maybe thought she isn’t completely straight, or that maybe you can just get one of the lucky draws where she wants to do a little college experimentation, no matter how toxic that idea is to you.

But to talk to her, at least for a second. To know her? It has become this nagging idea, this complete annoyance, something you feel like fate keeps trying to make you do, with every passing day.

And you really don’t even believe in fate, so this must be something.

The universe pushing two people together sounds unrealistic in your book, but when you look back on how many times you’ve seen her in the past few days you all but wonder, maybe it’s not so unrealistic after all. Maybe fate can be on your side, at least once, since it wasn’t ever before.

You bring up this idea without bringing up your mystery girl to your roommate Lucy, and she tells you point blank how she feels.

“You just need to get laid, Sawyer.” She says it with a smirk, as she struggles to get her own dress on for the part you’re about to attend, dragging her along wasn’t as hard as you anticipated.

“I’m being serious here.”

“No, you’re hyper-focusing on some hot piece of ass you won’t even tell me about which, by the way, rude. And what you need to do is get your head out of the books, get a laid, and move on, we’re in college, you don’t need to be looking for a forever right now. Now hurry up, take that shirt off and put this one on.”

You try to catch the button up she gives you but she takes you by surprise so it ends up hitting you in the face before you can even react. But you give her a disbelieving look before changing and moving on with the conversation.

It goes to figure that this point if you brought up that maybe you were looking for a forever in your future at twenty-two, that might sound a little more soft and dramatic than you ever want to be known for. So you keep quiet about you’re tired of the failed girlfriends or the failed dates, and you go about getting ready instead.

\----

Lucy ditches you almost immediately after she introduces you to her group of friends, two of them disappear right after they're introduced, Winn and Vasquez, you think they’re named. Either way, she says she’s off to get some sort of stronger alcohol and maybe dance, which leaves you nursing your shitty beer and your new acquaintance, James.

You’re nervous you’ll have to make small talk, and awkward conversation, and inevitably tell him you’re not interested when he starts to hit on you, but before you can even get into that, your eyes inevitably find something far more interesting.

Mystery girl, playing beer pong with a group of guys who clearly are taking advantage of her mostly intoxicated state, and the way she sways a little when she moves. Who clearly want to use this one for some unsavory things she doesn’t want to think about but finds herself still pondering when she watches the tallest guy run his rough and grubby hands down the side of her waist, moving swiftly to grab her ass.

You must be staring. You almost look slightly disgruntled, because James gives a chuckle.

You break your gaze to give him a look, and instead, he puts his hand on your shoulder, and though you’d normally shake it off you don’t.

“That’s Alex Danvers.”

“Okay…?”

“And if you’re looking like you are now, and you haven’t even spoken to her, then I feel like since she -nor her sister for that matter- come with absolutely no warning, that I should be the one to give you the news.”

The way he raises an eyebrow, and looks, you expect the worst, you find yourself swallowing hard even as you as the question burning at the tip of your tongue.

“What news?” You wish the question had come out higher pitched than you originally wanted, you take a sip of beer to cover up the feelings.

“That she, is only going to cause you trouble.”

You give him a skeptical look.

“Not to mention from my understanding, she’s straight, but -” He shakes his head and gives his large shoulders a shrug, and you’d feel intimidated by his size if he held himself any differently. “Alex does a dual medical major, but as of late it might as well be a triple major with her new, vast interest and with hands-on experience in near alcohol poisoning. Those guys won’t admit it, but they really don’t have a chance with her either, not anything past tonight anyway.”

You give him a bit of a disgusted look because you have to wonder if he knows this first hand but before you can even ask he interrupts you.

“I’m dating her sister, Kara. She’s always very worried about her.”

“Oh.” Suddenly that part slides into place, the way he knows a lot about her seems to know more than you ever knew. Not that you knew much anyways, outside your vague observations. You think this might be the sign, to let it go. That fate really isn’t about to push you together, and you’ve almost accepted it when the unexpected happens.

“Hey! Hey, James!”

You don’t need to have heard the voice before to know who that voice was coming from, you could have taken a wild guess, but the way your new friend forms a concerned look while still maintaining a casual smile still explains a lot of it.

“Hey, Alex.”

“I’ll just let you two -” But before you can excuse yourself to leave and exit this situation before you’re stuck, Alex, as you’ve learned is now standing in front of you, albeit leaning against the table closest to her.

“You’re not Lucy.”

“No, I’m not.”

“James said he was bringing Lucy with him.”

Her face scrunches up so in an adorable manner, and its so contrasted to the concentrated almost grouchy look you had seen in the hall the day you saw her with far too much caffeine on her person, and it makes you crack a grin.

“Actually Alex -”

“Actually, I invited Lucy, who then said she was going to see if her friends were going as well so we could meet up. Sorry to burst your bubble, but if she’s really who you’re looking for, I’m sure she’s around, she mentioned something about more alcohol.”

You didn’t mean to interrupt James, but for whatever reason, you just couldn’t help yourself. Then again, if you look back, you’ve never been really able to help yourself when it came to pretty girls anyways.  Your unfortunate gay ass will suffer that consequence as long as you’re alive, you know it.

“No, that means she’s probably making out with someone, and that is not something I want to witness again.” She’s shaking her head almost a bit too rapidly before she finishes her thought and you kind of find it cute. “Then who are you?”

“Sawyer.”

“Sawyer?”

“Well, Maggie. Maggie Sawyer.”

Alex rolls her eyes so hard you’re concerned they’re going to follow out, but she’s got a grin cracked so wide that you don’t think she’s really all that annoyed with your playful banter.

“Well, Sawyer. I’m Danvers. Alex Danvers.” Her eyes get a bit wide but only for a second. “I think you already knew that though. With James and all that.”

You’re chuckling, and before you know it she’s letting out a soft laugh, and all you know is, drunk or not, straight or not, you wouldn’t mind making her do that a few more times in your lifetime. Or at least tonight.

“Well, how about it Sawyer, wanna go get something to drink and dance with me a bit?”

She’s so confident when she asks, but you swear your heart stops for a full ten seconds before it decides to resume its rapid beating, your mouth suddenly draw, and your jaw dropping for just half a millisecond. But James elbows you ever so subtly and so you recover.

“Uh, yeah, shit, yeah of course.”

You look at James to make sure it’s okay, he just throws his hands up, but clearly, gives you a warning in his looks. You clearly have no intentions of heading that warning though, because here you are throwing all your earlier thoughts out the window to go dance with a girl who might not even be a little bit gay.

“Well come on then.”

And you don’t know what shocks you more, the way she grabs your hand to tug you along, or how absolutely soft her hands feel, and how nice they fit in your own.

\-----

The night goes on and things get a bit crazy, you’ve had a little too much to drink. You can tell this because your vision feels fuzzy and you tried to recite the periodic table but barely could say the word helium before collapsing in laughter at the look Danvers gives you.

It’s sufficient to say you’re drunk.

But you’re not a lightweight and you’ve won competitions with guys twice your size before, it may have been only twice but it counts. Either way, you know that you’ve had a lot of alcohol, but you know that Alex has had more.

She’s stumbling and falling, generally speaking, you’re both a mess. You both end up outside, on the porch, she’s digging into her purse for something, meanwhile, you’re hyper-focused on catching your breath and collecting your thoughts.

Both of you have let go of any fears throughout the night, you’ve danced a bit too close to each other. She’s brushed your arms enough times that you think if someone would die of a gay heart attack, it would be you. And at one point she’s already tried to take off her shirt.

You’re both very drunk, but she’s had more and you can see why people in her life, important people to her, would care about her. About how much she’s been drinking.

You can get why you feel like you should care. Why you’re starting to care.

(You make a mental note that you’re a mess, you’ve just met this girl, and you’re a gay mess. And you file it away for another day. Another sober, coherent you, type of day.)

Clearing your throat, you hope it gets Danvers attention. It must work because she’s looking at you with large curious eyes and you feel like breathing is suddenly a bit too hard.

“Hey, maybe we should get you back to your dorm, yeah?”

“You trying to take me home, Sawyer?”

She’s teasing, you know she’s teasing. But apparently your body doesn’t because it betrays you as your stomach swoops, there’s a flash of arousal and your feeling your face heat up.

“Only because you're a bit of a mess right now, Danvers.”

“Hurtful, but somehow I’m sure true.” She grins again, and you swear your heart literally forgets its entire job of beating when she does. She’s beautiful, and you are very gay, and her being straight is starting to becoming a factor she can apparently ignore.

You shrug not knowing what else to say and she tilts her head with a look that's too hard to decipher.

"Thank you."

"Huh?"

"For being you. Before this, I got some of the shittiest news in the world and the first thing I wanted was to get blackout drunk, but you were a pleasant surprise."

"Oh. Um, you're welcome?" You're not what sure to say to it but you give her a reassuring smile anyways because no one deserves to feel alone, and if you have anything to do with it no one will ever feel alone around you, you won't let anyone experience the same thing you have in your past.

And then just like that the tense air shifts to playful again and she loops her arm over your shoulders, and leans her body into you a little more into you than you expect, so you sway. But it would not have been as bad if you hadn’t almost completely fallen over at her next words.

“Take me home.”

\---

At some point, you manage to recover, because now even though she’s leaning against you, the two of you have made your way almost all the way across campus, and you’ve only stumbled once.

It’s been relatively quiet the entire walk, besides a few jokes and comments, and Alex once again teasing Maggie for her inability to say helium. The silence gets interrupted though when Alex tilts her heads towards the clear sky and the stars and hums.

“Something on your mind, Danvers?”

“Yeah.”

You chuckle because of course, that’s her answer.

“Care to share?”

“The stars are beautiful. Amazing, and breathtaking. I think I might be in love with them. Do you think you can be in love with the stars?”

You don’t know what you expected but you didn’t expect Alex to ask that while her head is tilted toward you with her eyes wide, asking you this seriously, a small smile on her face.

“Sure, you can be in love with anything you want to be, Danvers.”

“Good.”

Now you’re confused, but you play along anyway, you’ve reached her dorms now, and she’s stumbling with her keys to try and get her room open. It’s kind of adorable, but you still can’t help your curiosity. You have to ask.

“Good?”

“Yeah, it’s good.”

She’s got the door open and she has this look of pure excitement and success that you know is the only kind of happiness one can get when they’re a little too drunk. You return her look with a kind smile, dimples and all. You know this because she reaches out to poke one, and causes you to laugh.

“Why?”

“Because you remind me of the stars.”

**Author's Note:**

> either way, i'm gonna write a companion piece in alexs point of view because you're missing a little bit of her side in this as well.


End file.
